Coma patient
by mk94
Summary: Zombieland AU Tallahassee wakes up from coma and just thought to live in zombie land. He gets to know the 'real life' survivors and tries to get together with columbus. And his little son Buck is alife there too. Well, I try that this becomes readable XD Warning slash!


**Warning! Slash! Kissing included! Columbus/Tallahassee LOVE!**

_*Peep…peep…peep…*_

„Do ya hear that?" Tallahassee asked the group. The younger people looked at him, about to enter their car. "What are you talking about?" Wichita asked and also Little Rock and Columbus watched him irritated.

_*Peep…peep…peep…*_

"There! There was it again!" The man spoke up again, looking around. The girls giggled and Columbus just walked up to his partner (*cough* Lover *cough*) carefully taking the man's hand and guiding him to the car. "…I would never doubt you," he whispered to him. "Oh, shut it, kid…" The older man growled annoyed, but couldn't hide his smirk for what the boy is trying.

_*Peep…peep…peep…*_

"THERE! There again!" He looked at the others, only to see nobody. "What?" The car was empty, the girls nowhere to see. "Where are they…" he looked over his partner who was still holding his hand. He just smiled at him.

_*Peep…peep…peep…*_

"I think it's time." He said, letting go of the other's hand, walking away. Tallahassee was confused. "Time for what?!" He shouted after the boy.

_*Peep…peep…peep…*_

"To wake up… someone's waiting for you…"

"What-?"

Columbus was gone. The girls were gone. The car even was gone. No zombies, no road and everything turn dark.

*Peep…peep…peep…*

He opened his eyes carefully, trying to get used to the light. Everything was white. He felt himself wrapped in something comfy but also his head buzzing painfully. When he looked around, he found himself in a white clean hospital room. Flowers and bouquets were placed around.

*Peep…peep…peep…*

And then he saw him. Columbus, complete in white and washing the man's bare chest with a sponge like he does that every day.

*Peep..peep..peep…*

"Columbus…?" He croaked out. Why did he felt so weak? He was just walking around with the others and now…

"…Sir…?" Columbus mumbled surprised, looking at him.

*Peep. Peep. Peep.*

"Am I dead? Did they get me now?" Tallahassee asked. His head hurt. And that peeping noise is getting really annoyed. Was he in a hospital? Is that some wet dream with his partner in a nurse outfit? Possibly not. Of course not. His head…damn fucking hurts! He tried to stand up.

*Peepeepeepeepeep!*

"Wait! You shouldn't stand up right now!" the boy said, trying to push the patient back into bed. Now that Tallahassee thought about it, Columbus just went away. He took the boy's wrist and pulled him into bed. He shifted so that he lied above his partner. "Don't ya dare to scare me like that ever again. Understood?"

"What-what are you talking about?"

"I'm talking 'bout you jus' walking away, spitfuck. Ya know I can't handle more losses…" he growled, pulling the boy into a kiss.

Jayme couldn't understand for what he deserved it. Not only did he come too late for his job, no, he came late because of his discussion with his boyfriend who just happened to cheat on him…again! Also that he still is a virgin! If Donny would just accept that he just needs time…but no, he just looked up his fuck buddies till the college student is ready. Nice. Then he had to clean their well-known coma patient Jack Mullins. Just to tease him! He felt like the whole hospital knew that he found that man attractive which is even possible to believe, with Krista, his co-worker being all kiss-and-tell like.

And now, he got officially harassed by said patient. Jayme tried hard to keep his eyes open, pushing the body away. 'Wow, still in form after two years of sleep' he thought, blushing when he realized it and trying even harder to reach the remote to call other nurses.

"Hey Jayme-honey, I brought a surprise-WHAT IS GOING ON!?"

"100% not what it looks like!" Jayme said quickly, breaking away from the kiss. Donny threw away his bouquet of roses, stalking over to them and harshly pulled his boyfriend away from the now annoyed and irritated patient.

"Ouch! Stop it, Donny, that hurts!" the boy shouted, trying to calm him with gently touches on the shoulder but still trying to pull away.

"Oh! You want to make out a bit more?"

"That's not what I-"

Tallahassee growled as he saw that asshole kissing his boy. His glare tightened as 'Donny' started to grab his boy's butt, making him squeak in surprise. "Hey! How often do I have to tell you not to do it here!" Columbus whispered angrily, pushing the other without success. "Stop it Don!"

"What, you seem to like being harassed-"

"THAT'S IT! HANDS OFF HIM!" Tallahassee screamed furious, jumping from his bed, running at that piece of shit, ignoring the gadgets he was attached to. One clean punch in the face and that guy flew to the ground. "Don't! Sir, Mr. Mullins, calm down!" Columbus shouted shocked, pulling at him to separate the both men. Tallahassee did at he was told, this name…why did he know his name?

He couldn't think further when Donny threw his fist at him. Tallahassee dodged it easily, just as the next few punches. "Donny! NO!" He could hear Columbus yelling at the other.

When Donny attacked the patient, he ran to the remote and pressed the button, afterwards he opened the door, calling for nurses in the area. Jayme then ran back to the fighting men. "Donny! NO!" He yelled at his boyfriend again, holding back an arm from him. Big mistake. Donny threw his elbow back to free himself, hitting Jayme right in the face. He stumbled and fell backwards, hitting his head on one of the hospital gadgets and lost consciousness. Yup, not his day.

"Columbus!"

"Don't you dare looking at him like that!" Donny snapped, trying to punch the man again. He just shoved him away harshly, slamming him against the wall and kneeled down to his partner. He checked the boy's head, gently stroking his curly hair. Then he was harshly grabbed and received the awaited punch from Donny when the other nurses entered the scene.

Donny was thrown out and taken away by the police disturbing of the peace and because he attacked a patient, Tallahassee was put back into bed and taking care for everything a just awoken coma patient should get and Columbus was taken out the room, taking care of his injuries.

Tallahassee felt strange. Hospital? How did he come into a hospital? A nurse came in. "Everything ok?"

"Wichita?"

The girl looked at him shocked. "What did you say?" She walked over to him. "I called ya Wichita."  
>"I'm from Wichita…who did tell you…" she then had a glare on her face, "Damn it, Jayme…" She sighed. "Well, my actual name is Krista Rock. I'm here to check on you if you're able to meet your family."<p>

"My family…?"

Wichita-or Krista now-glanced over the clipboard. "Well, seems fine to me. I bring them in."

"What?"

Before he knew it, the door opened. "DADDY!" His son shouted, running towards him, throwing himself to the man's neck. "Buck…Buck!" Then it hit him.

They moved away from Florida after the divorce. He wanted to visit a cousin in Ohio so they took a plain. It only took them a taxi drive to reach their destination. But really, do all taxi drivers in Ohio drive that crazy!?

He only remembered that they crossed the road when the traffic light was red and holds his son tightly to take in the most damage. Looking down at his smiling child, he knew he did right. "Hey Buck…Buck…" He whispered over and over again, hugging his son tightly. "You live…" he chuckled, feeling few tears escaping his eyes. His son chuckled, "You too, daddy!"

"Hey, can you tell daddy how long he slept?" Tallahassee asked. Buck looked over to Krista who held up to fingers. Two month?

"Two years! You slept two years daddy. But now you're awake and I can live with you again! We can play again!"

"…Yeah of course you will, did Uncle Frank take good care of you?"

Buck nodded and hugged his father again. Then Frank entered the room. "Good morning sunshine. Heard you beat somebody's ass when you woke up. Why doesn't it surprise me in the least?" he smirked. "He deserved it, by the way." Tallahassee replied with a smirk.

"Well, I let you talk in private, when something is needed, call." The young nurse spoke up, leaving the room.

"Thanks Wichita-arghh! Krista, sorry…just-"

"Nono, it's fine…I like that nickname. I think I keep it," she said, winking him humorously and closed the door.

The reunited family cuddled together before Tallahassee spoke up again. "So, Buck, want to tell me about what I missed?"


End file.
